Impossible Virtue

by Spirit Waves

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1.
this one goes out to you and you and you and you
2.
Solid State 01:57
i love you i love me i love you
3.
4.
Fireflies 03:16
i love you so much that i want you to hurt me a flare's gone off so i'm getting off to a favorite sensation i don't care what you become i don't care what becomes of you i don't care where you cum i hear firefights out in the beyond yeah i see fireflies in my room i hear firefights out in the beyond i see fireflies in my room a miracle that's gonna save us well i guess we all want to believe that all of our fiction can just turn to our fate wait wait wait wait it's not too late in the real world they fall apart nothin ever works itself out
5.
6.
Beaded 05:10
you might as well just hate me my intentions were fucked from the start a drunken cupid sorely missing every arrow aimed at your desperate heart and me i saw you as a light that might illuminate the darkest dark but tunnel vision takes over i don't think that i could ever be the deeply ingrained subcutaneous artifact that you are to me i try to dig it out i just dig deeper when will you come to bury me whole? i can try to dig it out i just dig myself deeper a hemorrhage that i once called home just a hemorrhage that i once called home and maybe we just got off on the wrong foot you know a missed platform could be a fresh start our beaded neckties will make sure that we hang together and our mutual friends will there to sing at our funerals as our hands left the railing we realized that we never wanted to die, but at least we still went out as the perfect partners in crime
7.
Strings 04:35
there was a string that tied us together the tension tight as we pushed away, so i sharpened my razors i licked my teeth i shed my skin and i braced myself, but in the end i will always step back i never wanted to cut it or tie another string i don't trust anyone else you don't know what i'd do for you and you'll never know i'm an avenue you'll never cross i'm wanting different things i'm just an insane weirdo you're insanely weird though i'll miss you more every time i sing this song but you cannot hurt me you cannot hurt me anymore you will never hurt or see me again a thousand blows and i'll take every one of them right now but you will never hurt me again so the string that tied us is severed and the arteries are bleeding out and ripped to shreds and i'll try to forget you someday i'll try to remember but hopefully i won't forget why i fled i needed love i needed something you've always had it in abundance but never from the ones you wanted you're spoiled rotten never from the ones with power and bitterly, i pontificate someday i'll be like them and you will still have nothing fucked up and alone, you'll regret it i'll make sure you regret it bitterly, i pontificate someday i'll be just like them you always said don't forget about me well you should have thought of that before you forgot me
8.
1 Txt Lvl 01:44
you showed him snow before you showed me love now it's cold there and you want me to come but i know there's something fishy sinister and frozen in the water i just wish that you believed in me the same way that i've always believed in you i just wish that i could keep you warm it seems like he gave you a puffy jacket full of ice cubes all wet and all alone and he never picks up his phone not a text message sent no words said yet nothin set you think he loves you but you're on your own
9.
Anger Song 12:41
the actus reus of envying a jealousy that consumes me whole please believe me i never wanted to hate you i was just trying to find a home i've loved you for two years now i don't know how it's stayed this way but the words i breathe won't utter anything that breaches your contract i know what i can't say i never wanted to harm you in any little way i never wanted you as an enemy the relationship between you and me has soured the relationship between you and me is poisoned and i'm not the one who poisoned the well you've always acted so oblivious but i know that you can tell what kind of damage you've done this is the song that takes everything out of me every drop of blood and bead of sweat in my body drain myself and slip it all in my pen i'll write my songs and you'll never see me again it's the only way that you'll ever listen to anything that i say there's a pressure strong from each and every one of my friends and they all want me to call this miserable thing to its end and when it's finally dead their presence strong, i can stand with the lessons learned i may live to walk again two damn years of pushing and pulling away two goddamn years of millions of words typed with nothing to say two fucking years of being the shoulder that you leaned on two thankless years of pain that i apparently only bring upon myself people see the shit that i go through and they all tell me to get the fuck away from you i laid in your bed and i sucked your pretty cock but i guess that those are just the magic words for me to not be allowed to say so i'll just scream them i know you know what i mean you can't keep me silent i know the things i've seen i wish you could beat me to a pulp and put me in my place i want to see the anger on your pretty fucked up face the self-loathing tied to you what a goddamn addiction i feel it taking over such an impossible prediction another week where you don't talk to me another incision another lover who doesn't love you out of my jurisdiction i mention how we touched each other and you just call it fiction i mentioned how we touched each other and you call it fiction tell me i'm schizophrenic what a contradiction tell me to go get help and now i'm evicted i mention how we touched each other and you just call it fiction i mention how we touched each other and you just call it fiction i mention how we touched each other and you just call it fiction i mention how we touched each other and you just call it fiction i still love you with all of my heart every single beat is for you
10.
Brother 03:13
i know you because i used to be you i said all the same impulsive ridiculous shit that you do and i hate you because your cynicism never helps but i love you cause you're my friend at some point you've gotta accept that you've still got to live in this fucked up, fucked up world at some point you're gonna find that there's nothing you can give that'll make all the bad guys go away there's no one you can count upon and being so god damn contrarian will never help you to carry on i'm not trying to say to be a coward i'm just saying that life is cruel and no one wants to be taken for a fool no one has ever wanted to be somebody else's fool saw you in the mirror staring back in wonder and i smashed you bits of broken glass in my clenched fists i despise you your syllogisms are flawed by default but i love you and you are like a brother to me and it hurts but i'll survive my heart will stop but i'll still be alive and it'll hurt for a while for as long as you get to smile

about

"hi guys! spirit waves here to announce my 7th record, IMPOSSIBLE VIRTUE, which will be available on april 15th on the visual disturbances bandcamp, spotify, amazon music, itunes, tidal, etc.. this album is compiled of little tracks that came about here and there during the aftermath of NO HOME, as well as a few fragments from many years ago, and represents a more jealous, angry, bitter side of myself in relation to certain unfortunate happenings in my personal life. i'm not going to lie, i genuinely feel terrible about the lyrics of a few of these tracks, but that's just the nature of temporal emotion, and i think it is healthy and important to explore these parts of ourselves within our art, even if we really, really can't stand them.

i'm debuting the track BEADED today, which i hope is a good little teaser to get you excited for the album. the album itself isn't as epic or sprawling as the two other albums that i consider my 'major' albums, she made me want to vanish. and NO HOME, but it is certainly a fantastic experience and uses its shorter runtime to great effect. i am currently hard at work on another record as well as preparations for a tour that should be going on in june/july, so stay tuned! i love you guys, and can't wait for you to hear this record! thanks for all the support.

much love,
otto william peyer iv aka SPIRIT WAVES
xoxo <3"

credits

released April 15, 2016

[VD033]

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